Down Day

I have to admit that I've been having a hard time these last couple of days. Late last week my husband was assigned to deploy later on this year. This is something I have been dwelling the back of my mind ever since we were reunited last year, but never actually thought would happen. We've already endured about 18 months apart since we've been together, and let me tell you it is hard. Very hard. The fact that we are still together is a testament of how strong our relationship really is. I know that we can survive more time apart, I just don't want to and I don't think we should have to.

I fantasize about the days when my husband and I can actually enjoy a "normal" life. Not having to worry about military protocol, exercises and being on completely opposite daily and weekly schedules from my husband. Not to mention things like being able to go on spur of the moment weekend getaways, date nights, our own actual home, holidays and family functions, and course, starting a family of our own.

I just feel like we are living in limbo, we're stuck. I am so ready to get off of this train and actually start a life with my husband. I've been harboring these feelings for quite awhile now, but I guess it all just came to ahead when we received word about this most recent deployment.

However, it is times like this when my appreciation for my husband is strongest. Sometimes you just need someone to hold you and tell you everything is going to be okay while your emotions pour out of you. Being showered with kisses and "I love you's" helps too.

Thanks for listening.